The 10 strangest conspiracy theories

0
335
Illuminati confirmed. Source: sofakingpodcast.com

Forget everything you thought you knew to be true. The living are dead, and the dead are among us.

 

Yes JFK and Hitler are alive and well, Miley Cyrus and Paul McCartney didn’t fare so great however.

In the light of recent Holocaust denier leaflets being passed around Victorian universities, we take a look at some of the strangest Reddit conspiracy theories that will have you questioning everything you think you know.

1. The moon.

Made of cheese? Landed on by NASA? No, it’s made of lies and deception. Just take a look at what Revisionists have to say about it – it’s a lie perpetrated by the government, and everyone is in on it.

Scientists are approaching the idea of a moon with preconceived notions, and don’t we all know how that ends up.

According to the Revisionists, what started as a rumour then got repeated enough times to become fact, new gods were invented and then the idea that the moon goes through monthly phases. Not only this, but our whole solar system is an apparent lie.

Whenever will you wake up to the lies that you have been fed?

Best of all, if you can prove the moon’s existence, they’ll give you $100,000. So get searching.  

2. The Earth is flat.

Continuing with the planetary theme, I regret to inform you that our Earth is actually flat. Yes, you’d best watch yourself if you think you’re just going for a wander, because who knows just where you’ll fall off this plane.

NASA is a company that has to support itself somehow, and how better than to fake anything that the regular human can’t prove wrong. Or so the Flat Earth Society says.

It all works out pretty conveniently for governments around the world, as they silence anyone who knows the truth, just look at OJ #Framed.

Watch out Shaq.

Shaq hitting us right in the science. Source: Flat Earth Society

So forget time zones, gravity, and the fact of things vanishing over the horizon, we are on a flat plane, like a sort of Lego town.

3.  Or is it?

Sorry, I meant to say it’s hollow. Why, you ask? Because Nazis.  Yes, Hitler didn’t commit suicide, he instead used his underground tunnels to get to an isolated airstrip and fly to the South Pole.

Our hollow Earth. Source: TokenRock.

And how can we prove this? The Aurora Borealis. It’s the gas escaping from the interior of the globe, according to 17th Century British astronomer Edmund Halley.

The Hollow Earth Research Society Canada believes that to this day, there’s still some of the 2000 scientists and 1 million public from Italy and Germany living there.  

And what else proves this theory I hear you ask? Nothing. After all, why would governments want people with this knowledge trying to trek down to the South Pole?

4. The Holocaust.

Rather offensive and keeping with the Nazi theme we have the theory on how the holocaust isn’t real.

As BibleBelievers.org says – any intelligent and open minded person can see within five minutes of research that it is in fact, a HoloHoax. Their words, not mine.

People simply fell ill and died at the German work camps and no autopsies were conducted, just eyewitness. 

5. Chemtrails – like aeroplane contrails.

Basically pollution, basically the government spraying us like we’re a field of corn. Except they’re using Boeing aircraft, and it’s controlling our weather patterns.

The proof. Sourced from chemtrailsgeelong.com

And yes, it’s happening right here in Geelong. The group also holds apparent ties to holocaust deniers – they were named in leaflets distributed around Australian universities.

What does ‘the government’ hope to attain with this method? Death.

Why? No, not the Nazis this time, they don’t provide any explanation – just referencing the recent asthma storms in Melbourne.

6. Nuclear weapons don’t exist.

Neither does nuclear power, it’s all a lie. Just look at this Reddit post, it has all the answers.

No need for scientific proof, as long as you can stick to a theory. Just don’t ask Reddit user sayswhat about the submarines.

7. JFK was not assassinated.

A classic. Four in ten Americans believe that Lee Harvey Oswald was not acting alone, saying that there were at least two gunmen at Daley Plaza.

Most of those say it’s a hunch.

8. Hollywood celebrities cloned.

Yes, Miley Cyrus is dead. She was found in the desert bruised and dehydrated, all a part of the Disney sex trade conspiracy.

She has since been replaced with a double to make sure that none of us notice anything, and giving Hollywood execs the chance to make more money off her concerts.

And it’s not just Miley. Bieber’s name also gets thrown around as people try to explain his rapid image change. And of course there’s the Paul McCartney theory which is very similar.

Not convinced? Just watch this hour and a quarter YouTube Vid that explains the whole thing, including the Reptilian Government.

9. The Reptilian Government

See above video. They shapeshift and use mind control on all of us.

10. Salsabeard the pirate

Not real. Just a good laugh from the Reddit community, and something that shows how necessary a proofread is. 

[user_deleted1] 3007 points 3 years ago 

That Jar lids are made super tight, so that when Women attempt to open them, they can’t, and ask a Man to open them, which they will (98.9% of the time). The point of this is to keep the Patriarchy in-place.

[user_deleted2] 2384 points 3 years ago

I am a former employee of a large company that produces salsa for nachos. I won’t say which one or provide many details to protect me identity, but all I can say is that most     producers of products that utilize jars have close ties to the Patriarchy and I can confirm   that on multiple occasions the tightness of our jars were examined.

Shit_buller 2135 points 3 years ago

“…provide many details to protect me identity” Are you a pirate?

KingKha 1467 points 3 years ago 

There can’t be too many pirates working in the salsa industry. He may just have             accidentally given himself or herself away.

toxicmischief 1346 points 3 years ago

I’ve heard the tall tales of Salsabeard.

Dicentrina 877 points 3 years ago
 
Yarrr! This salsa be too hot to be called MILD. Shiver me tortillos!

 

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here